On the Blog today I want to dive deep into a topic that not many cover, Personal development addiction is a real shadow aspect in the industry that isn’t talked about enough. Personal development is AMAZING if you’re coming at it from an energy of ‘i’m ready to take control of my life’ .
However If you’ve ever found yourself in a fan girl moment, not seeing the results you desire, or a constant obsession with fixing yourself – chances are, you may be just like I was, suffering from personal development addiction and not seeing the results because it is constantly taking you out of your power.
In today’s vlog, we’re going to talk about Why we often find ourselves addicted to personal development yet still not seeing the results we seek.
Do you ever feel like you read all the books, did all the things, but still nothing is moving forward in your life? And In return you find yourself stuck in an endless cycle of being addicted to personal development or healing work BUT nothing is changing?
Maybe this statement sounds contradictory for being both a growth seeker, someone who does healing work and a teacher on developing the self through empowerment. But Hear me out – There are definitely some light and shadow aspects towards personal development as a whole.
Let me first start by saying I deeply believe personal development is amazing for self-growth and healing. I think taking the time to invest in yourself and your personal growth is an incredible way to become more consciously aware. And I deeply believe it’s an important aspect of our personal evolution.
However there’s also a shadow element in the personal development world that is never talked about but I see it SO MUCH. It is actually a very similar concept to the person who is ‘seeking full enlightenment’
It’s those moments where there’s so much seeking and addiction to personal development that we become fixated on the high of chasing the feeling of feeling good. Basically we become so fixated on the chase of feeling good that the moment we stop reading those books or doing those courses or stopping those meditations, that we suddenly feel awful all over again. So we reach for another book and another and another and another….Chasing the same thing again and again trying to fix ourselves.
And It can become this intense feast or famine cycle where we’re chasing the feeling and choosing not to EMBODY and sustain the feeling in return.
The problem is we’re frantically searching outside of ourselves for answers but then once the book is completed, we cannot sustain it. We fall back into the same pattern over and over again. Why?
Because we’re not actually doing the work!
We’re not stopping to pause, integrate and apply the information we keep downloading back into our lives. And in return what happens is we fall back down into the same cycle, striving to heal and fix the energetic holding pattern because it actually doesn’t get healed.
We cannot do the same thing repeatedly and expect to get a different result.
You basically just put a glittery band-aid on it and actually didn’t go within the body to heal it and empower it. You downloaded the information, you received tons of insights, higher truth and expanded awareness. However, what I see happen is many people fail to apply the information we’ve been given because the addiction to fix the problem is much stronger than the ability itself to focus on the solution to heal, change and move forward with our life.
Why is this?
Because it requires you to face yourself and create change.
There must be a willingness to change. The ego hates change! It requires you to go into the body, push through the resistance, and clean up house, inevitably release what isn’t working. It’s a similar concept to refusing to clean up your room, my kids are great at this LOL. But you tell them, How are you actually going to play in here?! if there are toys literally everywhere, its a giant mess. You can’t. You can try. You can play with your toys in the tiny cycle LOL that you cleared up as you push around the mess around you or you can just get up and do it.
What does this have to do with addiction to personal development?
Well the shadow aspect is real change doesn’t happen unless you’re willing to break the cycle and actually apply the information to create real results.
Otherwise reading the book or taking the course is pointless if you’re not applying it to your life. If we first don’t clean up what isn’t working, by addressing the fear, the uncertainty we will just continue to repeat that cycle and refuse to take the action we need to take.
So If you openly ask yourself:
- Are you reading the books, taking the courses, doing the meditations and not seeing any results?
- Are you taking your power away by fangirling/fanboy moments of idol worship?
- Are you addicted to the chase of fixing yourself and not focusing on the solutions?
Yeah, it’s because you’re forgetting your energy is the missing link.
We don’t need to constantly fix ourselves.
We were never broken to begin with, We Need to Empower ourselves.
WE ARE OUR OWN HERO – OWN YOUR MAGIC
We idolize our Heroes but forget to look in the mirror and remember we ARE our own hero.
What we admire within them is also within YOU
Whether we’re trying to change ourselves to fit in: in a relationship, for a biz venture or any situation,
We’re taking away our power & forgetting our own magick.
I’m a firm believer in support systems & support groups but we must not lose ourselves within the process.
I remember fangirling over Gabby Bernstein a few years ago and I’ll never forget that moment – because it showed me How I was taking away my own power, my Authentic truth, and vision – because I was putting someone on a pedestal forgetting my own magick.
On Today’s vlog, I talk about this with a hilarious improv I did in the past around Why we are so addicted to the chase of personal development.
Okay, I hear you so what can we do about it?
Well, the obvious answer is to Energetically check in with yourself and ask yourself:
Are you seeing real change and results with your growth process?
If you are, great!
If you’re not, ask yourself, am I doing the internal work? Am I actually applying what i’m reading, am I actually doing the soul work, taking the steps, doing the exercises i read in these books? Am I going deeper than just read, absorb, next thing, chase, read, absorb, next thing.
Am I showing up for my soul?
Am I allowing the integration and application phase? Change does not happen in a vacuum, it happens in the feeling, movement, embodiment, and action we create in our day to day lives. It is created in our beliefs, our habits, and the shifts we make in our identity.
It happens when we begin to nourish our soul consistently, create valuable habits, practices & systems to sustain our emotional healing.
It also begins by taking our power back, putting our soul needs & desires first for the highest good, and keeping ourselves accountable by showing up for our soul’s highest truth. Then consistently learning how to sustain that, create new cycles and Learn to naturally empower ourselves.
But first, it begins with actually having a willingness to change, to move forward, and to co-create the results you deeply desire to see. It requires doing the Inner work to create external shifts and changes.
3 STEPS TO END THE ADDICTION
Here are some basic steps I would begin to take if you find yourself in the same shoes as me.
1. Energetic check in: Are you seeing real change & results with your growth process & practice?
2. Take your Power Back: What are some easy ways I can begin to take my power back & claim my own magic by reconnecting to my own soul?
3. Follow through on your Application & Allow space to integrate the information you receive – stop chasing the next best thing and pause. Bring awareness to what you’ve been given & start applying it. ?
BONUS step to think about – Get Intentional with your Growth Process. Instead of purchasing six courses, 20 books, 5 meditation albums, checking oracle cards every morning, – HOLD THE PHONE, am I speaking to you?
Get Intentional and simplify your growth process. Show up with intention to where you are learning, cut back so your mind can focus. We physically cannot focus on over 20 things at once, it is scientifically proven our brain can only focus on one thing at a time. So get Intentional about simplifying your growth process, where you choose to invest, apply, integrate, and reconnect back to your soul!
Simplify, simplify, simplify.
Hope you enjoyed this lesson, this has honestly been a big reason why I personally wasn’t able to see results in my manifesting process. We don’t often realize by not going inward and learning how to reconnect to our soul, we are still searching outside of ourselves for the answers & taking away our personal power!
It’s so important to reconnect to your soul and begin aligning with your soul’s higher truth to take the action you need to take!
What does this lesson bring up for you? Share with me in the comments!
P.S. If you need deeper help with this, Check out the Soul Nourishment Bootcamp which is open for enrollment this week!
It’s time to take your power back!
A 5 week bootcamp to learn how to reconnect to your soul & create powerful habits, systems & practices to receive soul information, amplify intuition, apply spiritual principles, manifest and access your alignment to Manifest from a place of your co-creative power!