Our Next topic in our Creating a Spiritual Life series is a topic I often avoid but I’ve had so many requests on this one! I felt it’s time to start talking about it: Conscious Mindful Parenting and how to deal with it as an evolved individual moving into a New world.
The Mindful Parenting world that is
General Parenting advice is honestly something I usually cringe about because everyone is different and has different values. I’m not usually in a lot of mommy groups. I don’t really like that realm of judgmental advice on which way is best to raise your kid. eff that.
However I thought it’d be interesting to share some tips on being a sensitive as a conscious parent.
Before I was a mom, my spiritual practice was great, I was calm, peaceful, had time for all I enjoyed and it was pretty smooth sailing aside from the drama of being a college student.
Although when I had my first kid, all that stuff went out the window.
I often had to put their needs above my own, we both as parents had to work on creating a thriving environment for our family and then I was faced with new lessons of spiritual growth.
This only was more amplified after the birth of our preemie daughter about four years ago.
Suddenly I was in a world of self-neglect, finding a shower turns into a treasure, a privilege just to have and often breastfeeding while simultaneously trying to feed myself as I was running on empty….
It really does change your worldview and perspective on things.
ADD MORE MINDFULNESS TO YOUR PARENTING
When I really began to find more peace was the moment I started applying more Spiritual truth into my parenting. What I found more enlightening is how I could merge my spiritual practice into my new world with my two beautiful children. It’s where I found the most SANITY as a parent.
Because let’s face it spirituality is a whole other realm when you’re working on dealing with temper tantrums, real-life crisis meltdowns (Elsa has lost a shoe people) and teaching your kids right from wrong.
It’s not realistic to just say “love and light” and go to your meditation pillow. Zen out.
It just doesn’t work that way, ha sorry lol.
I often find my Children to be my best teachers. They teach me to grow emotionally, mentally & spiritually. It wasn’t until I stopped separating all parts of me that I really began to feel whole, you know?
Because we often separate our spiritual identity from our real life and this is why we have so many problems show up. We’re not realizing we can integrate these Spiritual concepts into every area of our life.
Most importantly incorporating our Intuition in our Parenting.
We often deal with a lot of crazy as a parent, like that one time my kids decided to confetti packing peanuts all over the house or my kid got lost in the hallway at 3am screaming…It can easily offset our equilibrium and ‘happy place’.
What I came to find is that including mindfulness within my parenting is what helped me as a sensitive become way calmer & centered especially as a parent.
It’s all about leaning on spirit!
you know before you lose your shit…just kidding…maybe ?
THE PARENTS ENERGY INFLUENCES THE HOME
I remember hearing this from one of my networking buddies Stacy Meredith Cohen and this statement holds SO MUCH TRUTH to it.
She said, “The Mother in the family is the one, who really holds the energetics of worth and is the emotional barometer of harmony in the home.”
In other words, the Mom’s energy in the room influences the entire family. but honestly I feel it’s both ways, both the mom and the dad are holding the container that influences the family dynamic.
When I feel peaceful and calm, my children usually reflect that.
When I feel emotionally overwhelmed, spent and chaotic, my children usually reflect that chaos right back at me.
And it goes the same with my man, when he’s stressed out we kinda all get stressed out – this isn’t new info people. Energy feeds on energy until we change it or stop responding to it. It’s vibration 🙂
This goes back to the law of attraction and vibration aka Like vibrations attract like particles of the same.
So as a Mindful Parent, we must look at our family dynamic as this container of energy.
When we bring in this new level of awareness we can start to see that when we decide to change the container by shifting our energy, we shift the energy in the room.
Sometimes it’s not so much about Controlling your kids, or getting them to cooperate as much as it’s about Learning to Shift How WE are responding to the situation.
Are we responding from a state of fear, control, and anxiety?
Are we responding from a state of Loving kindness, positive reinforcement, and Connection?
Don’t beat yourself up if you’re feeling the latter, this concept is a lesson we can apply repeatedly when we fall astray. It’s something we can work on overtime. You’re doing a great job!
So it begins with learning to work on our energy and bring in more mindfulness to our parenting techniques.
As we work on our energy more, we actually become a more consciously aware parent.
OUR INTUITION SHOULD ALWAYS BE HEARD
I thought this would be a great topic to explore as parents we tend to unconsciously listen to society’s view of parenting or letting everyone else under the moon tell us how to raise our kids. When really it’s about getting back to our intuitive nature.
When I had my first child – everyone kept telling me what to do, how to do it, what I need to do and so forth.
It was a very exhausting and vulnerable time for me.
I ended up not listening to anyone and followed my own internal guidance. Best Decision Ever.
It really comes back to your intuition and knowing personally what is best for you may not work for someone else. And here’s the thing – that’s absolutely okay!
Take what resonates – filter out the rest.
Here are some of my tips for conscious parenting and breathing easier while spiritually evolving with sensitive kids and a sensitive you 🙂
TIPS FOR MORE MINDFUL & FUN CONSCIOUS PARENTING
1. Kids Adapt to the Energy in the Room.
Kids are so sensitive it’s something I sometimes forget but they are always feeding and absorbing what you are feeling. Adapt to a new world of Spiritual Truth that begins by realizing your energy is influencing the Room around you. That also means your vibes are influencing your children’s vibes. Your Vibes are influencing the home environment either given your emotional state, your habits or your beliefs about your own childhood. It’s a bit trippy…
Therefore if you’re looking for more peaceful living, it begins by focusing on yourself not constantly trying to change and control your kids. It also begins by focusing on changing the family dynamics – the energy dynamics in your home. That might mean setting boundaries but also connecting more with how they’re feeling will help YOU heal and evolve yourself.
TIP: When you Focus on Changing Your Energy, You Shift your family’s energy dynamic.
What is something you can do to Shift your energy?
Set an Intention for more Peaceful Living.
2. Always Use Intuition
This is simple but often times we can question ourselves, maybe due to how we were raised growing up. However If it doesn’t feel right – it probably isn’t.
There was a habit of yelling when I was growing up so that became the norm in our household. However now that I have my own kids, I had to work on this bad habit of yelling because it was all I knew, yet intuitively deep down I know – I really hate yelling. Yelling completely zaps our energy, it’s incredibly draining and It can make us feel like crap. So If intuitively I knew it didn’t feel right, I also know it meant there’s gotta be a better way.
The better way is Switching what we don’t want with what we DO want.
We often yell because they’re doing something we don’t want them to do right?
Naturally, we react and say “Stop jumping on the couch” reinforcing the behavior.
BUT intuitively I know – the right thing to say is, What I actually want them to do instead which is not jumping on the couch. The Solution.
Sooo What’s the opposite of jumping on the couch?
“Can you sit down please or go jump on the carpet?”
Granted I’m no saint, but That method is a lifesaver for power battles.
TIP: Always use Intuition.
A little bit of intuition and a little bit of law of attraction can go a long way 😉 Where are you avoiding listening to your intuition in regard to your parenting?
3. Lower Expectations to reduce the illusion of control
The illusion of control is such a big topic but I think it’s really powerful to apply to our Parenting. I think as parents especially we can have these unconscious energetic holdings towards how we expect our kids to behave and act, the same way we may hold expectations about our spouse or another family member.
if your energetically holding onto someone through expecting a certain outcome from them – you’re not seeing them in their true spiritual light.
TIP: Release your Expectations of them.
Ask yourself – Who am I not Releasing? What am I trying to control?
Forgive yourself in the process. This is all quite normal. Think about how many people do this all the time without realizing it!
FOR MORE ON THIS ONE: Mindset monday: the illusion of control
4. Fill your Love Cup
For the love of God, Please fill your Love Cup. The majority of us as parents grew up with all these fucked up mentalities of putting ourselves second, running on empty and being a people pleaser as normal.
Then we wonder why we’re stressed out, burned out and exhausted all the time….. It’s because we have no love to give if we’re running on empty.
How does the car go without any gas to fuel the tank?
Well, your energy works the same way.
When you take the time to fill up your love cup by making sure you are giving back to yourself and allowing your energy to thrive, everyone benefits from that. Fill up your cup first – even if it’s difficult do it anyway. Make Time for Yourself – Take Time to Enjoy yourself even if you’re in a room together.
TIP: I Choose to put myself FIRST for the highest good of all involved.
When My cup is full, I can serve my family, my career and the people around me at a greater capacity when I am taken care of first.
ACTION: How are you giving back to yourself right now? What is something you can do on a weekly/daily basis to Give back to yourself?
5. Playtime Messages
This one is for younger kids, mine are 4 and 5 and a half so we’re still learning as we go 😉 However, this is a fun one. Look at what signs and messages your kids are telling you with their toys.
What are their favorite shows, imaginative stories or characters? Our Children are interconnected to us and the Divine. Sometimes we don’t realize they speak to us non-verbally by the symbols they are communicating back to you. Also, what are their favorite animals or stuffed animals? Figuring out their animal totem is a fun way to learn about their personality and yours!
Dragons and unicorns are our favorite right now 🙂
TIP: Try VISUALIZATION with your Kids
A fun exercise to try with little ones if you’re having a hard time communicating at what’s bothering them. Ask them what their favorite animal is and then ask them what does their animal need to feel better. Play around with this like a storytime session.
Sometimes we don’t always realize but kids speak strongly through Visuals and pictures because they’re more heavily right-brained as they grow. So working with their subconscious to understand their needs is a fun way to see inside how they’re thinking and feeling about the world around them.
6. Share your Spiritual Practice & truth with them
Introducing my kids slowly to more mindfulness has been a fun adventure at our house.
Frequently I find my kids using words like abundance, manifesting, chakras, Healing Golden reiki Light for owies, angels, yoga for kids, using crystals to help with bad dreams, or drawing oracle cards together.
There are tons of fun ways to bring more spiritual fun into our kid’s lives.
I think what’s so cool about this is my kids are growing up in a paradigm where they see these things as normal vs. crazy woo woo nonsense. For instance, manifesting in our house is just kinda a normal everyday thing so we’re teaching them to use their own manifesting power and Intention 🙂
Another thing we do is we’ve been teaching a lot about regulating our emotions with breathing techniques like pranayama. We found that the time out chair doesn’t really work but teaching them to sit on the couch with some calm down techniques totally does wonders. Or this one thing we learned on daniel tiger which I thought was genius – count down to calm down with mindful breathing.
TIP: Start to think about what are some fun ways you can start to share more of your Spiritual Truth with your own Kids?
There are all sorts of fun ways we can begin to think outside of the box of normal parenting styles. It’s really a trial and error process this whole parenting thing but I wouldn’t change it for a minute.
Our children are the evolved version of ourselves, it’s good to be open to see that as sensitives they are mirroring what we are feeling internally.
I find if i’m feeling grumpy my kids are feeding on that energy and expressing it by acting out. If I’m in a good mindful state – they’re peaceful and surprisingly getting along.
They are little expansive infinite beings illustrating to us all sorts of symbols and messages we need to hear. It’s really awesome to take the time to listen to what they are communicating even non-verbally and see what fun messages they are trying to tell you.
While being a parent is a full-time job, (that might involve wanting to scream into a pillow sometimes) it’s fun to adapt our spiritual side towards our children and help them learn through mindfulness.
I challenge you to have more fun in your life by integrating more mindfulness with your kids 🙂
What are some of your own ways you like to incorporate more mindfulness and spiritual truth into your children’s lives?
Share with me below!
p.s. If you’re a parent and this is a topic that you are currently struggling with, I definitely recommend researching more into conscious and mindful parenting. I also invite you to seek out more support:
Two of my favorite Ladies specialize in this topic, you can check them out here:
Seven Generational Parenting with Stacy Meredith
The Mindful Mom Revolution (she’s got an awesome community on fb too 😉 )
? Next in the Series, we’re going into one of my favorite topics: Spiritual Business and Bringing more Intention into your Career – Stay Tuned!