t’s a beautiful thing to observe your situation in this way, it shows to me that you are already on the path ofself healing andself love. Questioning why is always the first step because it is stepping outside of yourself, stepping outside of your comfort zone.The process of self-love is not always easy, even i still have some days where I fight with body image but in general it’s truly learning about being comfortable in your own skin. Accepting yourself for who you are regardless of your faults. Learning to love your imperfections, How do you see yourself? Is there things you want to change and why do you feel the need to change these things?
I feel like in the past when i would crush on emotionally unavailable guys it’s because i felt like i was missing a part of myself, a part of loving myself for who i am and being true to myself. Being happy with myself. Unrequited love is so hard but it’s a deep teacher of self-love underneath. It’s almost as if you are falling in love with the idea of love itself rather than the person. In the process of self-love you have to enjoy your company, find what makes you happy for you, take time to yourself, simply have fun, really be in the moment with yourself, love the good the bad and the ugly and know one day there will be someone out there who will love you for you. This person will love all of you even your faults because that’s truly how magical love really is, it’s unconditional.
So i think a simple answer to this is learn to accept yourself for who you are, all of you even your faults. Rose quartz or Jade are excellent stones for self-love. I’m also fond of labradorite. This crystal is giving me a pull, i think it might help you with what you are going through. 🙂
Hope this helps
sending love and healing light <3